Posts by Frazzled UBM

16

"Worlds Apart" A danish movie about a young coming of age Jehovahs Witness , screening on SBS2 tonight in Victoria

by smiddy in

jw
friends

i know their have been screenings of this movie before , but this notice is for any newbies here that may not have seen it previously.

it is scheduled to screen at 10:25 pm on ch.32 sbs2 sun.25/8/13 .

maybe other states in australia can view it on-line , or request it be shown by sbs in their state.. it is an interesting movie , and apart from minor flaws , pretty accurate despite the beard,though i am told the danes are a bit more liberal than the west.. the real / actual jehovahs witness this story is based on has a cameo appearance near the end of this movie in the train sequence.. please let me know if you watch it and your thoughts about it .. smiddy.

Frazzled UBM

yes Sydney SBS 2 at 10.25 pm as well - as a newby I am looking forward to watching it

13

Anyone used Steve Hassans techniques to successful get a JW to see TTATT

by Frazzled UBM in

i am back online (sitting in the cathay lounge on my way to sydney) after a week with my wifes dysfunctional jw family in the rural philippines.

thanks to your recommendation i have been reading steve hassans book and it has been very helpful for improving my communications with my wife by making me understand what will keep conversations going and what will shut them down.

it has also helped me to understand what is going on with her.

Frazzled UBM

Leavingwt - did you already post your brother's expereince with your parents some time ago - if so could you let me know where I can find that post?

32

Regrets for knowing the TATT? Strange feeling overcoming...

by BluePill2 in

today is a strange day.. i have been out of the borg for a while now.

some years have passed and i thoroughly enjoy the freedom, not having to bend my mind and rape my soul to force myself to do and say things that i don't feel or believe.

i started my own business, got a wonderful girlfriend and made some friends (that are not monsters like the wt$ likes to portray others).. my parents, siblings, brothers-in-law, cousins, aunts, uncles, ex-wife, "friends" and my daughter, have cut their contact to me.

Frazzled UBM

Hi BP - I feel for you and I hope you are feeling better as a result of the feedback from everyone here - hang in there and if it makes you feel any better - i hate those very same BASTARDS for keeping my loved one captive but at least I am not cut off from her physically even though I feel cut off from her metaphysically a lot of the time. Vent as much as you need - unfortunately if ignorance can be bliss so knowledge can be painful but in the end I know which I would prefer. Cheers Frazzled

13

Anyone used Steve Hassans techniques to successful get a JW to see TTATT

by Frazzled UBM in

i am back online (sitting in the cathay lounge on my way to sydney) after a week with my wifes dysfunctional jw family in the rural philippines.

thanks to your recommendation i have been reading steve hassans book and it has been very helpful for improving my communications with my wife by making me understand what will keep conversations going and what will shut them down.

it has also helped me to understand what is going on with her.

Frazzled UBM

Thanks everyone for your comments -

boc - very sound advice, which I am trying to follow.

Julia - I will find and read those books and pick bits to share with her cos she won't read them herself.

nonjwspouse - thanks for your tip and hang it there I share your struggle.

Same to you what happened - hang in there and hoping all us UBMs can keep sharing insights about our respective journeys so we can all make progress - have you read the hassan book? - very useful even if it is a bit of an info-commercial.

jgnat - good advice as always _ I am goal oriented so for the time being will try to get a result even if it take s along-time but if a side benefit of improving communication with my wife is tht I get to see more of the non-cult identity then great.

Leavingwt - could you please ask your brother to join this forum and relate his expereince with your paretns - it would be so beneficial. Thanks

13

Anyone used Steve Hassans techniques to successful get a JW to see TTATT

by Frazzled UBM in

i am back online (sitting in the cathay lounge on my way to sydney) after a week with my wifes dysfunctional jw family in the rural philippines.

thanks to your recommendation i have been reading steve hassans book and it has been very helpful for improving my communications with my wife by making me understand what will keep conversations going and what will shut them down.

it has also helped me to understand what is going on with her.

Frazzled UBM

Hi Everyone

I am back online (sitting in the Cathay Lounge on my way to Sydney) after a week with my wifes dysfunctional JW family in the rural Philippines. Thanks to your recommendation I have been reading Steve Hassans book and it has been very helpful for improving my communications with my wife by making me understand what will keep conversations going and what will shut them down. It has also helped me to understand what is going on with her. But I wonder whether anyone out there has actually used his book to get a strong JW to recognise their phobias and how the WBTS creates and reinforces those phobias and then to exit and overcome the phobias? I see his approach has potential but doing it effectively seems tricky. I would be really useful to know what works best in practice.

Thank you for any tips you can give me

Cheers

Frazzzled

54

Premarital sex--how prevalent?

by wafflesandpancakes in

in my old congregation, everyone seems clean.

mostly chaste courtship, kingdom hall wedding, blah blah.. well there are lots of cases of fondling but they were soon forgotton.

when my husband and i confessed to sex before marriage, the elders were disgusted.

Frazzled UBM

I suspect there is an awful lot of hiding stuff that goes on. My wife was leading a total double life when I met and impregnated her otu of weldlock. Unfortunatley her rebelious streak ended when she got reinstated following her disfellowshipping.

17

The WTBTS-What A Joke!

by JW GoneBad in

jw
friends

i found these questions that were part of a theocratic written review for the week of february 24, 2003 that are in need of updating:.

multiple choice: the faithful and discreet slave mentioned by jesus at matthew 24:45-47 is (a) the governing body of jehovahs witnesses; (b) all anointed christians as a group on earth at any given time; (c) jesus christ himself.

back in 2003 the correct answer would have been (b) all anointed christians as a group on earth at any given time.

Frazzled UBM

This is fantastic - just cut and pasted it and sent it to my wife suggesting to her that the Governing Body must have nothing but contempt for Witnesses if they think they can do this and it will just be accepted without question. Unfortunately the GB are probably right in assuming they will get away with this with most Witnesse - but hopeful some will wake up and smell the coffee.

18

Does the WBTS encourage circumcision?

by Frazzled UBM in

my wife is determined that my son will get circumcised when he is 10 or 11. i tell her that if she wanted him circumcised she should have done it when he was born and that it will be his choice and if he says no i will support him all the way.

one thinkg i am not sure of is whether she is so adamant about this because the wbts requires or encourages it or because it is a cultrual practice int eh philippines (certainly leaving it until 10 or 11 seems to be a filipino thing.

so my question is more directed at the practice of circumcision rather than the age at which it is done..

Frazzled UBM

okay everyone I hear you and thanks for the input

18

Does the WBTS encourage circumcision?

by Frazzled UBM in

my wife is determined that my son will get circumcised when he is 10 or 11. i tell her that if she wanted him circumcised she should have done it when he was born and that it will be his choice and if he says no i will support him all the way.

one thinkg i am not sure of is whether she is so adamant about this because the wbts requires or encourages it or because it is a cultrual practice int eh philippines (certainly leaving it until 10 or 11 seems to be a filipino thing.

so my question is more directed at the practice of circumcision rather than the age at which it is done..

Frazzled UBM

Thinking about it though I admit that if it was encouraged by the WBTS I would probably take a stronger stance against it but because it is a local cultural practice in my wife's country and I want my son to maintain some identification with his country of birth and his mother's family I am a bit more willing to compromise if that's what my son wants. Is that wrong?

18

Does the WBTS encourage circumcision?

by Frazzled UBM in

my wife is determined that my son will get circumcised when he is 10 or 11. i tell her that if she wanted him circumcised she should have done it when he was born and that it will be his choice and if he says no i will support him all the way.

one thinkg i am not sure of is whether she is so adamant about this because the wbts requires or encourages it or because it is a cultrual practice int eh philippines (certainly leaving it until 10 or 11 seems to be a filipino thing.

so my question is more directed at the practice of circumcision rather than the age at which it is done..

Frazzled UBM

okay - I hear you - I iwll do what I cna to get him to recongize it will be painful (although they leave in the bath for hours before hand to soften the skin to make it easier and as painless as possible) and unnecessary. My older son had it done because his foreskin didn't retract and it became painful. This was quite painful for him (because the foreskin hadn't retracted) so he can talk to my younger son. I think it is my yonger son's choice though and as long as it is informed and not the result of emotional and social pressure from my wife and her family I would prefer he feels that he is the one making the decision.